So recently I have expressed my new development of hatred towards the poor little birds out side my windows in the morning. And again I have come to realize that the problem is the old man upstairs who tosses out full slices of bread out his window for them. This in turn causes the poor little birds to fight over the huge slices of bread. This results in much SCREECHING and nagging amongst them. 'HAWK HAWK...EECHH EECHH CHIKADEE DEE DEE DEEE" UGGGG! And he usually starts this at about 4 am. And this creates a noise that only someone as deaf as myself can not seem to tolerate. Of course the simple solution to this would be to break the fucking bread apart! Or smash his fingers with the pot!! I have asked 'Joe' time and time again. But he just does not seem to get it. Maybe there is a better solution? There is. One step up the food chain.
I came home after a usual stressful day Monday. As I approached the porch...there was 'stray Jay' along with his wife and son. (Yes they all come to visit now) I sat with them on the porch having some smokes talking about lobster and rain. Suddenly out from under one of the over grown Maple tree's in the yard darts out a cat and snatches up one of the birds. Then runs off over the fence with it. "Did you see that?" Jay yells. I was to busy running my mind to answer him. I could not have been more excited. Jay babbled on to his wife about it. It didn't take long before it was forgotten. But not soon enough the cat was back for seconds. He was in stealth mode under the maple tree sprouts. The ones that I will make sure will never get cut down now. Now we were all watching. and WHAM it was off and over the fence with another bird in its mouth.
I was instantly off to 711 for cans of tuna and cream. I was gonna keep this cat happy.
I was never very fond of Kittie Cats. Steve and I had 3 of them back on the Cape. 2 of them came with Steve. The other...Lady Guenevere...we adopted as a small kitten to keep Wadsworth entertained. But he ended up terrorizing her when I moved to Maine without Steve or Mizz Katie and Ozzie. Lady Gwen ended up living in the laundry room. It was no life for her. I found her a happy home with small brats to love her.
And so in my morning bliss...I make sure I put out cream every morning to bring the bird slaying Kittie cat around. And I have enjoyed the capture and death of at least 8 birds in the last 2 days while I sit in the morning sipping coffee at my window.
And just when I though it was over. Just when I thought I could put the pot away in the morning. The guy on the other side of me seems to have hired a 'personal trainer'.
"Hut ONE Hut TWO" I hear this morning. I look over and the two of them are laying on the cold wet cement. Doing fucking sit ups. I reached into the cabinet. Grabbed the pot. This guy has got be fucking kidding me with this. Is he blind? Does he not see me in all my mania? But most importantly...does he think he is exempt from...'the pot'!?
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